Mighty Thor VS 3-Legged Pussycat

I have a sick kid who needs two eyedrops in each eye three times a day, antibiotics twice a day, an amputee cat who needs pain meds every 24 hours and antibiotics every 12 hours...along with a change of shredded paper litter ever 4 hours or so, because the smell of pee-soaked paper is absolutely nauseating. I have to spend time with him so he's not caged up all day during his recovery, and when I do, Nate gets jealous and has a major meltdown, partly because he wants me to hold him instead of the cat, but also because he wants to play with Orson's lampshade collar, and by playing I mean trying to smoosh Orson's head flat inside by flinging himself on it, or trying to literally remove Orsons head from within the collar as if it is a decapitated head that is merely sitting inside a plastic bucket. He reaches in and tries to lift it out, then gets angry that it won't budge and smacks Orson on the noggin and lets out an emphatic and frustrated "AGHHHH!" which makes Orson leap from my lap and flee with the speed of a three legged Cheetah to escape the wrath of the little beast running behind him.

I'm selling tickets in case anyone missed the circus...