How to give your Mommy a heart attack, Toddler Lesson # 143

"Mom..." *gag* "BUG!"

That's what Nate said as he ran into the room, pointing at his half stuck out tongue, gagging.

Me: "Whaaaaaat?"

Nate: *points to mouth again* "BUG!"

Oh dear GOD! He's got a bug in his mouth!

Me: "A bug where, Nate?"

Nate: "Bug in the moush"

I knew it!

Me: "Well open your mouth, man! Stick out your tongue! Stick it OUT!!"

I sooo do not want to see a bug in my kid's mouth. I'm gonna lose my biscuits if I see even a leg...

Nate: *opens mouth...sticks out tongue...nothing*

Me: "Holy Crap son, did you EAT a bug?"

Nate: "Yes!" *gags again*

*shudder*

Me: "Geez, son! Well, what color was the bug?"

dreading answer...

Nate: "RED!"

ok...maybe it was a ladybug...could be worse

Me: "Was it a ladybug?"

Nate: "Noooo....BLUE?"

Me: "Whaaa?"

Nate: "YELLOW BUG!"

Me: "Son, did you really eat a bug?"

Nate "noooo"

Me: "Are you sure?"

Nate: "No. No eat the bug."

Me: "Are you kidding me?"

Nate: *giggle*

Me: "Get outta my face before I feed YOU to the bugs, you little stinker." *stifling my laughter since he nearly gave me a heart attack and made me hurl*